Someone shit on the floor
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize