you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
