I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
well you can't waste a boner
nutella sex= disaster
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
