What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You ate ashes out of my bong
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
