I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Randomize
