Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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