Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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