he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
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