You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
