they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
