If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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