I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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