Need sex. Gaining weight.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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