i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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