The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
