How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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