Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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