My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
