im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
