You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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