Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
