I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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