she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
