My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
