Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
He did a backflip because drugs
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
