my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
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he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
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We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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