That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
