they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
