google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
