Having a random hookup so left but love u
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
