nut hugger
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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