go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I could fuck to npr.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
