Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
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