You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
pray to the hookup gods
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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