You're completely useless in the revolution.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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