I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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