What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
