32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
