she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
