Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
