Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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