I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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