doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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