I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.