Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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