Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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