Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize
