Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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