its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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