I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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